MATCH PROMO Mr. Business' Thoughts On Sunday Night Voltage (Voltage 1)

Simon Incognito

Mr. Business
EAW ROSTER
Messages
13
Points
3
[You're scrolling through YouTube, trying to find a video to fill background noise as you continue with your days work. In you recommended, you find a video. The thumbnail depicts a rather narcissistic man in a suit talking towards an audience. It looks like boring stuff, but a lot of talking, so you click on it. As it loads up, you read the title of the recording. The title stands out to you as odd, as the name of the person holding this conference seems silly. "Mr. Business' Thoughts On Sunday Night Voltage" the title reads.]

[The video opens to the man in the suit entering the stage as the people in the audience applaud politely. The man seems to enjoy the applause, looking out to the crowd as if to soak it in. He then steps behind the podium]

Thank you, thank you. I am appreciative that all of you came out here today, on this beautiful Friday evening, to listen to me speak. I assure you that your time will be well spent here, as you will witness the greatest mouth in sports entertainment talk down to some....circus acts, for lack of better names. However, before I meticulously tear down my opponents, I suppose I have some groundwork to lay down.

Now, as you all are aware, I am not performing at Reasonable Doubt. Initially, I was upset. After all, I'm a future legend in this business. I should be treated as such! However, I was informed that I would be getting an equally important opportunity.

An opportunity to represent the great brand of Showdown.

Mr. Jackson and I are heading into enemy territory to protect the very reputation of our brand. Now, Mr. Jackson and I have had our differences in the close past. That does not mean we can't work together. I am more than willing to put my opinions on Mr. Jackson aside for the greater good. However, our opponents? Well, I have quite a few words for them. But who are my opponents? Who are the people who have the honor to losing to the two best rising stars of Showdown?

Mr. Magnum and Mr. Azrael.

Now, they're both rising stars in their own rights. They've even spoken out against me, calling me an "asshole richman". They want to put me down while they puff out their chest. Well, I'm afraid to admit this, but I'm not impressed in the slightest. When I first started my company, I had a long time friend and mentor of mine tell me a very important piece of advice;

"You can look big, but all it'll do is make you look smaller once you fall."

And I'm sorry to inform you two, but you will fall. Azrael, I know you feel deeply about this match. I mean, after all, you chained up a poor innocent man and made you hear your insane rambles. No normal man does that. Of course, I guess you wouldn't be considered a "normal" man. At least, you wouldn't consider yourself one. You would fancy yourself a demon, a devil, a force that can not be stopped. You would fancy yourself "supernatural". However, we all know that's merely an act. So, let's take a break from this fantasy world you've built for yourself and talk in reality.

You are nothing more than a man in a mask with too much money. You spend all this money on smoke machines, chains, make-up, all to build the lie that you are twisted. However, I've met men far more sadistic than you. I've seen men with basements that put your little chain-play to shame. I've sat across the table from men so cutthroat that they make this violent business look tame. Compared to them, you're merely a fly. I do not fear flies Mr. Azrael, for I am the apex predator of this business.

Now, we move on to a man who acts more like me. The self-proclaimed "Silver Bullet", Mr. Magnum. Now, like many of you, I watched his promo. I've heard his comparisons. He wants to compare me to the 46th President of the United States of America, Donald J. Trump. He wants a man with a few more holes in his wall.

[Mr. Business reaches into the inside of his jacket, before pulling out a Donald Trump mask and putting it on]

Is this better for you, Eddie Magnum?

Does this fit your narrative?

Because, the way I see it, you don't hate me. You hate the IDEA of me. You hate the idea that men like me could possibly be more successful than men like you. You hate that Donald J. Trump could be the President of the United States while you're out searching for scraps. You wanna know why men like me will ALWAYS be above men like you?

Because we're SMARTER than you.

Instead of viewing our goals with tunnel vision, we look at the big picture. We look at every possibility and every road and determine the most profitable one. We understand that the output is way more important than the output, so we don't care what we have to do to get what we want. Men like me? We're cutthroat. Meanwhile, you need someone else to show you the way. That's the exact reason I'm wearing this mask, to give you meaning to your words because once I take it off.

[He takes off the mask, putting it inside his jacket before speaking again]

Your words lose their meaning.

Because I'm not a cartoon, I don't have stretchable limbs or an infinite amount of money. I'm a man that's simply more successful for you, and that's what gets to you. That's what frustrates you, because you can say you're the most famous and richest man. However, you don't have any way of backing that up, do you? Just like Azrael, you've built yourself a fortress of lies.

And I'll be the one to tear it down.
 
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