MATCH PROMO ✨ "I found myself thinking very hard about the fact he has asked for the smoke, and what does that even mean?" // Dynasty 1 🌼

Kensingten Calhoun-Astor

The Steel Magnolia
EAW ROSTER
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Backstage @The Jeunesse Arena (sometime after Reckless Wiring has concluded)

Kensingten Calhoun-Astor finished packing up the last of her things and zipped up her suitcase. If people were expecting her to be down over the fact she missed out on her second opportunity to become the Specialists Champion, then they would be in for nothing but disappointment. Kensingten was happy with her performance against her toughest opponent to date, Darcy May Morgan. Darcy had proven why she was a champion and why it was going to take a monumental effort for anyone to dethrone her for that championship. Kensingten had given the match her all, but at the end of the day Darcy’s talent, experience, and sheer will to continue proving herself had won out over Kensingten’s untapped potential and athletic ability. The Steel Magnolia would have her day in the sun. She trusted the process and didn’t doubt her ability whatsoever. She knew how hard she worked in the ring and out of it, and why it was so important for her to succeed.

It was at that moment, Kensingten’s phone went off with a FaceTime call. The beautiful little face of her sweet angel, Dixie Rose Chamberlain came across the screen. The smile Kensingten already had on her flawless face grew even bigger as she quickly accepted the call. “Hey my sweet baby!”

“MamaMamaMamaMama! You did so good!” Dixie Rose’s precious voice was full of excitement. “I loved the match so much!”

“I fought hard, babygirl,” Kensingten promised her daughter. She was determined to raise Dixie Rose as a strong independent woman (who could obviously fall back on her trust fund should things go awry but that’s so not important right now), who should fight for the things she wanted in life and never settle. “But sometimes we just have to admit when someone is better. There will be more matches between myself and Miss Morgan, and one of these days her little butt is going to get beaten. But I will tell you this right now, sunshine, Miss Morgan won’t soon forget the battle we had tonight. Both of us will be better because of it and it’s always important to look at the bigger picture.”

Little Dixie Rose nodded her head, clearly agreeing with her mother. “It’s like you always say, everything is either a lesson or a blessing, and sometimes you get lucky enough to have both with a single experience. Is this one of those times for you, Mama?”

Kensingten thought about that for a moment. Her little girl had asked a really good question. “I think that this is a valuable lesson that could end up turning into a blessing somewhere down the road. There will be more championship opportunities for me, and next time I’m going to be even more ready to seize the moment and grab that little ole brass ring.”

Dixie Rose seemed pretty satisfied with that answer. “Grandma Angela says I have to go now because you need to protect yourself from the Corona and get out of that building. I love you so much and I’m so happy you’re my mama.”

Kensingten did her best not to be an emotional person but she couldn’t help the tears that filled her eyes. “You’re a sweet girl, Dixie. I’ll call you first thing in the morning. I love you.”

Dixie beamed and blew a kiss to Kensingten before hanging up the call. Kensingten clutched her phone to her chest for a moment, allowing the conversation with her pride and joy to marinate, and for her emotions to settle. A few silent moments passed and Kensingten finally dropped her phone in her bag. She pulled out a pastel pink and lace N95 mask and placed it over her face. “Time to brave the nasties and get the frick out of here! Heavenly Father, please forgive me for my harsh language!”

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“Well I just have to tip my little ole hat to Miss Darcy May Morgan. She was the better woman this time around at Reckless Wiring, and I wish her nasty little British butt nothing but the absolute best going forward! I’m sure our paths will cross again one of these days! If anyone was expecting me to come out here and serve myself a nice little slice of humble pie, then surely they don’t know exactly who Kensingten Calhoun-Astor is. My performance at Reckless Wiring was gutsy and inspired, and I’m certainly proud of how I performed in my first ever solo championship opportunity. Twice that little Specialists Championship has eluded me, but one day it will most certainly be mine! I’ve hardly been here a year, and I most certainly don’t plan on going anywhere. I will continue to improve and get even better, and turn myself into the most proper Hall of Famer this place ever did see!

There is no rest for the wicked either, as I find myself booked on Dynasty against the gentleman that defeated a bunch of dirty little rapscallions in a fatal five-way match. I’m sure Mr. Henderson’s little win was something to take note of, and congratulations to him on that. It’s an extremely easy feat to pin someone such as Miss Wren, and that’s something I know first hand. Now, I am not one to shy anyway from competition, but this match most certainly leaves me scratching my head. When I look at you, I can not help but wonder if you kiss your mother with that foul mouth of yours. You are definitely a crude individual Mr. Henderson, but that’s par for the course with people like you. You can read into that little remark however you wish, but I’m sure your rap sheet and those filthy music albums you like to record will back up absolutely every thought I have about you inside my head. A person like you should not be inside a wrestling ring. I can’t even begin to imagine how many showers I am going to have to take after I beat you on Friday! Goodness knows where those hands have been and as we face a worldwide pandemic that our perfect president is doing his best to control, I’m sure I will have to bathe myself in hand sanitizer and bleach so I don’t catch anything you could be carrying. A gentleman such as yourself has clearly been around the block a few times, and you are obviously a carrier. It’s quite clear that this company doesn’t do background checks, and I’m not at all happy that stepping into a ring with you will likely put my life in danger. I’m a God fearing woman, Mr. Henderson, and I am certainly praying to my Heavenly Father that he watches over me come Friday Night Dynasty. I will fight my little butt off to make sure you don’t make any unnecessary advances towards me since you already had something vulgar to say in that regard.

It really makes me sad that education is so poor in the trashy neighborhood that you obviously come from. I fully understand that not everyone can be born into privilege, and have the kind of opportunities I have been gifted because my parents were raised right and have actual values that caused them to work hard, but you surely should have learned how to act by now. You have no clue how to actually talk to a lady, and that is something I plan on correcting come Dynasty should we actually make it through the match without you trying to sexually assault me. You definitely need a lesson in minding your manners, but I reckon this is what I’m going to get every time I cross paths with one of you people. Obviously I would never suggest anyone get an abortion because that’s taking the life of an innocent, but we as a society have got to do a better job of controlling the crack baby population. Because lower class people are allowed to breed while hopped up on all those pills and dope, drug addicted babies such as Mr. Henderson are born. It’s an unfortunate part of our society and believe you me, I do my best to ignore it. I really don’t appreciate that I have to come to work and interact with such filth. It’s honestly heart-breaking.

I knew what I signed up for, and that would be situations that would be out of my control. I simply can not help the ignorance that put together a match featuring a classy, well bred lady and a common street thug who will likely end up back in prison in six months. All I can do is march my little butt down to that ring and handle my business like a real woman would. I know how to fight, Mr. Henderson, so please do not make the mistake of looking at me and assuming this is going to be some easy little brouhaha for you. I might not be a former gang member who used to shoot people for a living, but I have absolutely no problem pulling out a rifle and shooting you right between the eyes. I’m all for guns, Mr. Henderson, and I’m a sure shot, and if you try anything funny, believe you me, there will be some serious repercussions! I know it’s a stretch for me to believe that someone like you can be a bit more civilized, but I am going to put my best foot forward and assume we won’t have to resort to a good ole fashion wild west shootout! I haven’t had to hike up my skirts and get my boots out in a hot little minute, so let’s do our best to keep this match clean and give one another our best. I am sure playing by the rules is kind of a stretch for someone with a criminal background, but perhaps you can find some wherewithal to actually act like a human being and not some sniveling animal that needs to be put down.

This match is already giving me a headache and it hasn’t even gotten underway yet. I just simply can not believe I am being put in this dangerous, precarious position. I am sure Mr. Henderson is going to have a field day with this, and reply with some unintelligible psychobabble that only certain people understand. I found myself thinking very hard about the fact he has asked for the smoke, and what does that even mean? I can only assume given his background and where he comes from that he is openingly asking for someone to give him drugs. You know, I wasn’t that fond of this little South American tour and it really burns my behind that I’m stuck in Peru which shares a border with that horrible country Columbia. We know darn well that Columbia is the drug capital of the world, and there is no doubt that Mr. Henderson is over there right now putting himself in a position to act recklessly. He is a hazard to himself and to whomever he steps inside the ring with, and I will be speaking with my Uncle Jon, who is on the Board of Directors here! Matches like these should not be allowed to happen and while I am most certainly taking one for the team by subjecting myself to this kind of verbal and mental abuse, I will not do this again, period! I am a well trained professional wrestler and not some street fighter! That being said, I wish Mr. Henderson all the best! I am sure he will be ready to assert his so-called dominance and be completely uncouth, and while this sort of match is below me, I will be ready for whatever this monster brings to ring. I am no pushover, and I absolutely REFUSE to be this joker’s next victim!

Ta ta for now, Mr. Henderson, you dirty little fool. Ew."
 

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