MATCH PROMO Pork Fried Rice

Malcolm Jones

The One True King
EAW ROSTER
EAW World Champion
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PORK FRIED RICE

Jordan on The Wizards.

Lebron on The Lakers.

Jamie O'Hara on 2019 Dynasty.

There comes a time in every once-great man's career where they finally reach that crossroads they've spent their whole time avoiding taking the wrong turn onto. What tends to happen is they finally end up losing direction of themselves that the prolonged inevitable finally becomes a reality. Some men embrace that, make the necessary changes and adjustments to their approach and accept the fact that time has simply passed them up, readjusting to a smaller role that better suits their current output. Others however? Others live in denial, they spend so much time chasing that old feeling and trying to reach a level that is beyond their arms length that all they're doing is causing themselves to fall further down the totem pole of greatness. The once seemingly invincible aura behind certain names wear off, newer, younger, improved versions arise. They either walk away gracefully with value to their name, or they go down stubbornly swinging, only to constantly miss their target. Next thing you know a whole new generation has arisen and grown up whose only memory of that person is them being a shell of their former self. When it's all said and done, their legacy become more centered around the low points than anything else.

How will you be remembered?
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"I'll tell you how you WON'T be remembered. That's ahead of me on the all time list, because you see, for all of the amazing things you've been able to accomplish since entering this company and being deemed the future of this business, I've done all of that and then some and that's without the fluff and bullshit to go along with it. You won Cash in the Vault? Cute, I won King of Elite, you won the New Breed Title? Cute, I won the Interwire Title AND I main evented my first Pain for Pride against the very man that took that title off of you. But I ain't here to go down the list and compare first year resume's I think I've broken down your "illustrious" and "decorated" career enou-- fuck that, nigga I did your whole career in one year, suck my dick! The fact of the matter is, whether it be your rookie days, your prime, or whatever the fuck you wanna call this current run.. you can't fuck with me on any level. And it's cute how you can sit there and absolve yourself of all responsibility in regard to how much of a shithole EAW was when you flourished the most as if it's not a direct representation of yourself but the fact of the matter is now I'm in that spot you once found yourself in and guess what? Shit ain't perfect but it damn sure is the closest it could be to it. It's night and day culture wise, which is also a direct parallel to our abilities in the ring when I fuck around and show just how much you can't touch me on any level. You try to make it seem as if I paint myself as some squeaky clean saint who can do no wrong who has lead EAW to a flawless promise land, while at the same time painting yourself as some squeaky clean saint who could do no wrong even in the midst of EAW's dark ages. You allegedly spoke out against eveerrryyyyyttthhiiinngggg that was ever wrong with the company but nobody ever listened to you despite you being the "Ace". You were allegedly going to leave the moment you got drafted to Voltage because you didn't like the brand or it's weak ass roster, well congrats you're a quitter, but we already knew that. Instead of quitting you could have elevated your opponents, created new stars but nah no new stars were made from the roster that existed for the bulk of your 11 month title reign. Nobody ever faced you and then walked away a better person, someone we could look at as a future main player because of what you brought out of them, nah we just got a bunch of future burnouts and dudes who would find themselves wrestling in bingo halls in front of 10 people by the time April hit. Meanwhile over on Showdown, as much of a bitch that he is... I made that boy Drake King a STAR simply by associating my name with his. You think I HAD to entertain his bullshit "real king" nonsense after I won the only crown that matters in this company? Nah but I gave him the chance to show what he could bring to the table, and even though he went out like a bitch, he did what he had to do to win the title. It doesn't matter who I face, the moment they step in the ring with me their name is elevated to levels they never thought was imaginable because that's what happens when you are the face of a company and a name that people are invested in. You on the other hand instead of elevating you just dragged it down, and the funny shit is, the one person from that roster who actually broke out besides you and became a star was the one person you didn't expect."

Ironic how you been dreaming about the one that you was sleeping on.

"Keep it a buck, when you were facing Chris Elite you stuck your nose up at him didn't you? You didn't think he deserved to even breathe the same air you occupied because you saw him as lesser than you and unworthy of your time. And why? Because you didn't relate to him? Because he didn't look like you or dress like you? Because the shit he was referencing didn't register to you so you automatically didn't think it made sense and that he was just talking some gibberish? Because he wasn't the typical status quo bullshit that you were used to facing? A dude from the hood, coming out talking slang and repping his culture and you just couldn't fathom it and automatically chalked it up to him being talentless. Yet at the same time you were quick to call someone a cunt 100 times and other slang that only a select few people understood so what's the difference? That was the kind of bullshit attitude that pissed me off, that was the shit that made me go even harder to prove that people like us deserved a seat at the table and that even though we weren't what everyone was used to, we can still be successful despite it all. And don't get me wrong this ain't me caping for Chris Elite because fuck Chris Elite, but at the time we were cool and I'll never forget how Chris and I felt like outcasts because of you and the other bozos who happened to be at the top at the time. How people thought him beating you was a one in a million chance and when it finally happened people treated it as one of the most disgraceful things in EAW history like the dickriding fuckboys they are. And it was that same mentality that caused people to look down on me when I happened to win that No Way Out match at Fighting Spirit to guarantee my place in a Pain for Pride headlining match as if I didn't deserve it. That same mentality that caused people to look at Chris and I's main event match at Pain for Pride and scoff at it, think it wasn't worthy of a main event, because never in the history of this company had people from our backgrounds both been in a match of that caliber against one another. Might've been the same mentality that made you think you were too good to address me the first time we faced too, yeah I'm still on that, yeah apologize bitch get on your knees like Cameron during a Hurricane Hawk training session. Now kiss the ring. It's not my fault you didn't have the mental capacity to stick with it through and through, to put your big boy pants on and continue pushing despite you not necessarily enjoying yourself. You may have clocked out physically after the 1% disposed of what was left of your corpse, but you clocked out mentally months prior to that. When you gave yourself the moniker of the Ace and embraced the role of being the face of the company, the representation of a generation, you should have read the fine print that said through thick and thin, ups and downs, you have to keep on keeping on. If the company rests on your shoulders what the fuck do you think is going to happen to it if you simply just take your ball and go home because you don't feel like doing it anymore? This company could have very well been fucked on your watch and you wouldn't have thought twice because you don't give a shit about anything but Jamie O'Hara. You didn't care you had your little fall back plans right? Japan woulda embraced you at the drop of a dime, Philly woulda supplied you with an unlimited supply of cheesesteaks at their middle school gym shows. So whether EAW panned out in your absence or not was the least of your worries. Luckily for you it did though, and you looked at it as an opportunity to hop back on board and reassert yourself as the man, but you relinquished that position. You know who took the reigns when you decided to dip? No it wasn't Noah Reigner and it wasn't Theron Nikolas, it was ME. And if you think I'm giving you the keys to this whip back, you got another thing coming to you, cunt."

I'm the captain now.

"Not to mention, I have a knack for putting you old fucks in your place. Just ask the highly respected Heart Break Boy who I took the Interwire Championship from. Better yet ask the man who bodied you at PFP, Impact. I made that man look like a mere mortal at Wicked Games and continued to prove myself as a force to be reckoned with while you were doing your best Anonymous impression hacking computers like a fucking nerd. You was that desperate for a porn collection breh? And while we're on the subject of your match with Impact, weren't you supposed to never get a world title shot ever again? You can't even stay true to the stipulation how can anybody expect you to stay true to yourself? But whatever I'll shhhhh, that could be our little secret. You enter that Grand Rampage match in your hometown of Australia like the top cunt that you are! You kick those flogs' asses and throw em over the top rope! And you punch your ticket to Pain for Pride and challenge for a world title of your choosing! But I mean since we're abandoning the rules here, technically since I lost to Drake I can't enter the Grand Rampage but I might just do it anyways to spite you and ruin your moment in your hometown, you can't have nice things. But then again seeing you in your current state I don't even have to expect you to make it far in that match. Watching you break a hip and struggle to keep your breath in that match is probably more likely to happen than watching you actually win the thing. It's amazing how things change in an instant isn't it? You go from having the world in your palm and the moment you let it go for just one second, the world moves on from you and you're unable to reassert that grip you once had around it. Your leverage isn't quite the same, you can't quite figure out or remember exactly what you did to have things work out for you the way you did before because you were simply living in the moment, a moment that has now passed you up. Case in point: You went from damn near sweeping the EAW Awards in 2017 to the only 2018 award you won being in regards to getting your clock cleaned by a fucking equalizer at the hands of Mr. DEDEDE. Then when you came back your pussy ass didn't even try to get at DEDEDE despite him making your girl's life a living hell, nah you went at Theron because you thought pursuing his championship was more important than avenging that embarrassing moment for you. Now look, they've all moved on from you and are fighting amongst themselves and you can't even say you played a part in this happening. You aren't a factor anymore you simply just exist. For the first time since you entered this company in 2014 you find yourself in uncharted waters. You're in an atmosphere you don't fit in or belong in and are just trying to find where you go in order to survive. Unlike then though, we ain't rolling the red carpet out for your bum ass, we ain't singing your praises, nah... we taking it straight to your doorstep and showing you just exactly why you don't belong and you can either conform and join some shit that fits modern day Jamie like The Score or some shit.... or you can watch yourself fall further down the ladder. Come Dynasty you won't just be falling down that ladder... I'll be doing my job of kicking you off of that shit."​
 

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