MATCH PROMO Voltage 20/01 - KoE Semi final

Daryl Kinkade

Kink of Elite
EAW ROSTER
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Who'd have thunk it? Little old me in the King of Elite semi-finals. One victory away from the finals and one step closer to being able to call myself the king...no, Kink of Elite. It's kind of funny when you think about it. Me, a kid from Norfolk, making waves in the biggest wrestling company in the world. This sort of shit just doesn't happen and yet, here I stand, defying all expectations and reason fully prepared and ready to once again fly in the face of logic. I know this isn't going to be easy for me. I'm not stupid. I've already taken down Viz to get where I am and now I have to go through three of the best Voltage has to offer, but for once, I'm not concerned. I'm not fretting about what could happen. I'm just going to go with it. There's been too much stress and tension in my life recently and it's shown in the ring, so, this week, whatever happens, happens.

It's not like I'm unfamiliar with my opponents after all. I'll start with my buddy Charlie. Charlie...you're a dick. There's simply no other way to put it. Every ounce of your being goes into causing shit and growing that magnificent beard of yours and I'm the one who always has to clean up the mess you cause us. I'm the one traipsing round with a mop and bucket trying to make things look vaguely as there were before you appeared whilst simultaneously apologising to anyone within a ten mile radius who is unfortunate enough to be female, gay, Asian, black...well, anyone who isn't you, me or Rex basically. The thing is though, I wouldn't change you. You're a massive bell end but you're also partly responsible for us holding the tag titles. I can brag about how I'm the one who picked up the win and claimed these glorious bastards as our own or how each loss we've suffered as a team has been down to you getting pinned but the sad fact is, I can't be a tag champion on my own. The same as you can't. To hold these, we need to work together. Fortunately, this fatal four way doesn't require us to work together. It's another one of those every man for himself deals and that suits me just fine. In fact, the tension between us, the fallings out, the constant bickering, may actually play in our favour this time. Let's face it, what does everyone do when they face the pair of us Charlie? They go down the divide and conquer route. They try to drive a wedge between us and make us argue, so what's their plan of action now? Do they assume we're going to fight? Or do they prepare for us to work together just to be on the safe side? Or do they try and drive that wedge home and make sure we really do go after each other?

How'd that work out for you last time POP? Oh yeah, it didn't, did it? You've not really had the best of luck when you have to face MarrKade have you old buddy? Each time you step into the ring with us, be it as Chris Elite's partner, the National Elite title match or most recently in the Elimination Chamber, you've come out very much on the losing side. It doesn't seem to matter what you do or say in the build up, or what happens in the ring, we always get the better of you. Always. Every single time. OK, so, we've never had a chance to face off one on one, but that's irrelevant really. You'll be in the ring with both of us again and that never ends well for you does it? I'm sure you'll wax lyrical about how things are going to change. How streaks are meant to be broken. How our luck will run out eventually and you, the Prince of Phenomenal, will finally vanquish us on your run to ascend from Prince to King. Then you can go on to tell us about everything you've done in the past, all the titles, trophies and accolades you've collected whilst telling me and Charlie how we've achieved nothing without each other (because we haven't heard that one before) and how we never will achieve anything because we simply aren't you. When you've done that, and when Charlie and me have finished rolling around laughing at you, we'll get up, step into the ring and beat you, again. I'm not making any brash predictions about which one of us is going to walk out of this one the winner, but rest assure it will be either myself or Charlie. We're getting used to these multi man cluster fucks now and we're prepared for anything.

We're ready for unexpected attacks from the crowd. Or people jumping us from behind. While I'm not quite as hung up on it as Charlie is, I still haven't forgotten the shenanigans at Pain for Pride Jack. Yeah, we got a bit of retribution at Territorial Invasion, but then you walked out of that one on the winning team again, so it doesn't really count now does it? I'm sure you'll be heading into this thinking much the same as POP. It's only Kinkade and Marr. They're no threat at all, take out one and the other is fucked, that's if they can stop arguing long enough to have a match anyway. I'll be honest though Jack, I don't really have a problem with you. Some of it is because we've never really had anything to do with each other but mostly it's because I don't really care. Yes, that's right, I don't really care. Maybe that's a bit of Charlie's attitude rubbing off on me, but why should I? You're not the top guy in the tag division any more, you've lost the support of The 1% and now you're flying solo on my brand. I'm not going to say you're at the bottom of the pile Jack, that would be naïve of me, but you're not really near the top either, you're hovering somewhere near the middle, just below me and Charlie. I'm not going to take you lightly of course, but let's just say I'm not seeing you as the biggest threat to me at the moment.

No, the biggest threat to me at this present time, are the lovely ladies of the Jaded Hearts. Kass, Sienna, I hope you enjoyed your visit to Voltage last night. The next time won't be quite so pleasant I'm afraid. That's twice you've shown up in MarrKade's back yard now and made us look a tad foolish, it won't happen a third time. Now, I'm not a massive cunt like Charlie, that's obvious and, believe it or not, I actually like the pair of you. No it's true, honest. You are the one stand out tag team we have yet to face. The one we need to beat to cement out place as the Premier Team in EAW, and while Charlie may see you two as nothing more than walking vaginas, which actually is as close to a compliment as you're going to get from him, I'm looking forward to our match up. Rest assured though girls, while I spend a lot of time clearing up after Charlie, when he's in the ring, I let him do as he pleases. Like I said, I may like the pair of you, but I like these titles a damn site more and there is no way I'm letting them out of my grasp.

 

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