World Heavyweight Champion
Bronson, it’s a bit disappointing that even at this level you choose to disregard simple listening comprehension in favor of hearing what you want to hear. If you maybe looked at my arguments more holistically rather than sentence by sentence, we wouldn’t have gotten to a point where a significant chunk of your speech became a rant on a straw man. From the very first words of your latest video, you chose to misrepresent my points and then attack that misrepresentation. In your own words, ahem, “How could I gaslight myself into happiness… when I am happy? When I am succeeding? When I am literally on top of the fucking world?”. Well here’s the thing cunt, that’s not what I was referring to at all. When I referred to happiness being more than something you can simply gaslight yourself into being, I was speaking of your claim that even when you do lose, you’ll be happy. Even when you’re NOT succeeding, even when you’re NOT on top of the world, you’ll simply define it as happiness and move on. Of course, right now you don’t have to gaslight yourself into anything like you said, because you are currently successful as it stands. But what about when you’re not? What about when you fail, fall off the top of the world, and are faced with hardship after hardship? You claim you’ll just ‘make yourself happy’ by ‘looking at it that way’, right? Hence why I said gaslighting yourself into happiness. I think it was very much right in your face that the first part of that prior video wasn’t about your current state as champion, but rather about dealing with life’s PROBLEMS and how we differ in that challenge.

While you choose to simply ignore those problems, I choose to deal with them.

And to this method, you ask “Why should I live life avenging my mistakes when I can simply outgrow them?”. Simple. Because refusing to acknowledge the past only dooms you to repeating it. I know that for a fact because I’ve lived it. I was betrayed by somebody who I considered my best fucking friend of one time, Xander Payne. I trusted him even though he was an old rival of mine, even though he was not the trustworthy type. I trusted him, I paid the price for it, and most importantly, I didn’t get any sort of redemption over that mistake. Instead, when I came back to EAW, I barely even acknowledged what happened with Xander. I turned my eyes away, joined New Eden and in the process, grew to put my trust into somebody who had the same qualities as Xander. An old rival who was not the trustworthy type at all. Drake King. I put my faith into him, and where did that lead me? The same place it did with the Wildcards. I trusted Drake irrationally much like I trusted Xander irrationally, and why is that? Because I never fixed my mistakes. I never fixed them, so I could never completely learn from them. I made the same mistake twice because I ran away from that mistake the first time. Not acknowledging that history only doomed me into repeating it. But I changed. Once I started aiming for redemption instead of just letting shit slide and hoping to ‘outgrow’ it, I became a man who no longer repeatedly made the same mistakes. I redeemed myself against Drake, I actually dealt with that betrayal properly, and that allowed me to never go through that again. Earlier this very season when DOMINION was trying to invite me, instead of naively trying to see the best in Xander and accepting his offer based on pure goodwill, I rejected them completely. This time, I knew not to trust somebody so untrustworthy, somebody who was an enemy of my past. I knew this, and because of that, I was able to avoid his inevitable betrayal. I mean, you saw what happened to DOMINION. I was able to avoid that, because I used Drake’s betrayal to learn the value of trust. I learned that value from my act of redemption. I didn’t ignore Drake, instead I dealt with the problems I had with him. In fact, it was you who implied that mistakes of the past should be fixed rather than simply ignored and moved on from. Is that not why you condemned my choice to face you in Delhi? I tried to ignore and just “outgrow” KAIZEN by going for the top of the ladder without acknowledging them first, and what happened? The problem I ignored came back to bite me. My mistake there was ignoring them, and you were actually so proud of ‘teaching me’ about that mistake, were you not? So I don’t understand this sudden change in outlook. When it comes to dealing with KAIZEN, I should fully deal with them first before trying to step to you, but when it comes to other forms of redemption, I should just ignore them and continue living life? Your mindset constantly fluctuates depending on what fits your narrative, and the inconsistency that is derived from it is honestly tiring.

You have to understand that you’re not offering me any ‘recipe for success’ at all. You cannot apply your method of achieving happiness to my own. Your recipe only worked for you because you didn’t lose as much as I did. You’d love to look at it that way because everybody loves to act like they’re the ones who’ve gone through the most, but the simple fact of the matter is, you haven’t lost actual tangible things like I have. This is evident by the fact that you said that your frustrations were the “pressures” or the “the doubts” or the “enemies”, but compare that to literally being betrayed by your best fucking friend and losing the faction you centered your life around, or even breaking your lover’s heart and pushing her away. Your frustrations don’t compare to my own. You were able to ignore them and outgrow them because they weren’t that big of a deal to begin with. Pressure, doubt, enemies, these are things everybody is prepared for, and accepts as a part of wrestling. You can’t compare that to the things I lost in return for my titles. I was never prepared for betrayal. I never accepted the title in exchange for Minerva. Your frustrations are basic frustrations that everybody in our level could deal with and are fine with dealing with. I know this cause as you said, I’ve dealt with it all twice. I can tell you with first hand experience that the frustrations that come with being champion don’t compare to the frustrations that come with being champion PLUS having to fix the other things you lost in order to win that title. You can ignore your frustrations because they’re trivial, I can’t. My frustrations are actual problems that impact my broader life, past just wrestling. Even the other problems you had, trivial in comparison to mine. You talk about the ‘downsides’ you and Adam had to your title wins that you chose to look away from in order to allow yourself celebration, but even those downsides can’t be compared to my own because they were irrelevant to the moment. When you won your title, you didn’t actually care about the fact that you had to beat up your best friend for it because you two had spent a week prior to that talking all about how you both were ready for those consequences. Similarly, Adam was ready to see Bethany in that Glass Wallz match, so it wasn’t something he was forced to remember at the moment of his victory. Me? I was forced to deal with the fact that my title wins came at the cost of betrayal and heartbreak. And betrayal and heartbreak that I didn’t prepare for, nor was I ready to accept. I couldn’t just choose to forget about it and cry out of happiness inside that chamber after pinning Drake, because right next to me, Minerva’s half-dead corpse was lying there. You know how dumb it would look for me to jump around when she was just brutally attacked and still laying there? It’s so stupid to just suggest that one should ignore the downsides of life and voila! Life is beautiful just like that! When in reality, if you wanna live life right you have to acknowledge every part of that life.

You have to acknowledge the downsides, and if the downsides outweigh the good, you cannot just pretend otherwise.

So yeah, every moment DOES have a positive and negative side, but you were only able to look at the positives because your negatives weren’t as severe as my own. I can’t just look at the bright side of ruining my relationship. I can’t just look at the bright side of watching my lover get attacked by my best friend. I cannot just gaslight myself into happiness in moments that contain extreme tragedy. I can’t just choose to be happy like you choose to be happy, because I’ve lost more tangible things than you have. I can’t just ignore all that I’ve lost, or else I would have never gained them back. If I didn’t have remorse in the moment of winning the EAW World Championship at King of Elite this year, I would’ve never gotten Minerva back. If I didn’t have hatred in the moment of winning that same championship at Road to Redemption 2021, I would’ve just had to let Drake slide like I let Xander slide. For these moments, it was very important for me to NOT look at the positives and instead let myself feel the full brunt of the negatives, because it’s what led to true growth within me. It led me to righting my wrongs. It even led me to moments of happiness. You say that “even if there were problems to deal with, that’s just how life is, and if you’d rather get caught up in its problems you’ll never be able to celebrate the good parts of it”, but that’s wrong. I WILL be able to celebrate the good parts of life, when I reach a part of life that doesn’t have any problems. You choose to believe that there is no such thing, but I know that’s not the case. Again, War Games had no problems or downsides. You reject this premise and say that it DID have downsides, and that I simply chose to look at the bright sides which is why I was happy, but that’s not the truth at all. The downsides you refer to in War Games was the pain I had to put my body through, but to me, that’s not even a downside to begin with. The sense of adrenaline that rushed through me when I jumped off that structure and planted Jamie with a De Facto was more exciting than it was painful. Besides, getting hurt to achieve stuff is just something we’ve all accepted and prepared for, much like you accepted and prepared for having to beat up your best friend, and Adam accepted and prepared for seeing Bethany get brutalized. Ultimately getting hurt to achieve something is just another one of those trivial ‘problems’ that don’t compare to the likes of what happened to me when I won my World Titles. I lost actual things at that moment. War Games was void of true losses like that. Your Reckless Wiring win was void of true losses like that. Adam’s Pain for Pride win was void of true losses like that. That’s why we were able to experience such joy in those respective three moments. But I simply want to relieve that joy, but to a greater degree with this. I need a moment where I feel joy while winning a World Championship. It’s the final step towards my ultimate redemption.

After this, I will be done with this stage of life. You can keep pretending I won’t, you can keep telling me that I will just keep repeating this cycle over and over again, but I know myself better than you do. I know that there exists a moment where happiness is untouched by regret, and I know this because I achieved it at Territorial Invasion. I achieved it, and I will achieve it again with the World Heavyweight Championship this time. And I know what you had to say about my apparently being ungrateful for what I have, but that’s not the case. I am grateful for my two World Championships because I know it’s something rare, and that’s the whole reason why I even bring it up so often. But is it wrong for me to want more? Is it wrong for me to not settle for two wins that DIDN’T bring me happiness? I can appreciate them for what they are while still admitting that those moments could have been much better. Why should I not aim for that “better”? Why should I be happy with a tragic-filled moment? I know that tragedy will not end, and I know I won’t be ‘happy’ forever. But if I can just have a moment of happiness to make up for the two moments that I was promised it, but didn’t receive it, then that’s enough to at least leave me satisfied. To leave me not feel like I’m in an everlasting chase. I’ll have more struggles, but I won’t have to redeem them to the same extent that I have to redeem this specific moment. Why? Because you said it yourself earlier this week, it’s up to me to find myself and define happiness based on who I am. And I define my happiness as the moment where I win a World Championship without any loose ends. Once I achieve that, I won’t need to chase anymore. I will be complete. I won’t have to “find any reason to be unhappy” because I will have no real, tangible drawbacks to this victory. You’ll see it with your own two eyes.

The happiness.

The elation.

The absence of tragedy.​
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