- Messages
- 127
- Points
- 43
"No need to run and hide
It's a wonderful, wonderful life
No need to laugh and cry
It's a wonderful, wonderful life"
I obviously have a lot to say. Reasonable Doubt was a horrible night. Many have called it the worst night of my career so far. I disagree with that. To lose a title; you have to have been a champion in the first place. I climbed that mountain. I accomplished that goal. I am so grateful. So I'm not happy to lose the title; but I'd still rather lose and lose a title than lose and lose nothing, because I had nothing. Because I was nothing. I obviously have a lot of self reflecting to do. Nothing in my life has been more obvious than that.
What I'm not going to do is sulk and cry. What I'm not going to do is let this define me. What I'm not going to do is let this be the last anyone ever heard about Nikki Kimura. What I'm not going to do is let this be the most notable thing in my career. No. It's the opposite. This is just the beginning for me. This was a much needed reality check. I have nobody to blame but myself. I'm not surprised I was betrayed by Silas Mason; but have to admit I was little taken by surprise by WHEN it happened. But even more than that I am a little surprised that Silas Mason would pick such a talentless wrestler like Brianna Hill to support. Contrary to popular belief, I'm not stupid. Silas Mason moving on from me was always inevitable. I said as much when talking to Saori. I said that we were a means to an end. I knew Silas was using me; but that still showcased that I had enough talent to BE used. I had something to me. I don't think his betrayal changes that; but I will admit it's rocked my head a little bit. I'm a little directionless now. I didn't have the legendary title run I had hoped. But I'm not going to play the card, that so many AEW wrestlers have in the past. Like I said; I have nobody to blame but myself. I made a deal with the devil. I signed up for this. It's my burden to carry. Snakes in the Grass. Water is Wet. Such is life.
So while I'm feeling like a bag of shit; I am going to persevere. I am going to survive. I am going to do what I have always done and I'm going to learn from this. So while I say this was inevitable; I will have my revenge. Eventually. Because even though the timing took me by surprise; I won't let it slide. I am not going to move on until I feel vindicated. Because I care. I care so fucking much. This is all I have. I don't know how many times I have to say that I gave up everything to be here. I have been as honest as I can be at every turn, but the reality of it all is simple. I wouldn't change of it. I genuinely do believe that I learn from my mistakes; and I wouldn't be the person I am today without them. All was not sunny in Philadelphia; but I know what it takes to make sure that this is an important lesson. That I can still rebuild from the ashes of my mistakes. It is not over.
What makes me truly laugh is Brianna Hill. Brianna, you spent WEEKS talking about how she has changed. How you have found yourself. How you want to prove yourself. The only thing you have proven is how easily manipulated you are.
"Then all of a sudden it was like I couldn’t do anything on my own, that I was living in the shadow of someone else by pledging my allegiance to La Familia".
So to break out of that shadow you signed up for help from someone else? You felt uncomfortable with any form of spotlight, and had to hide in someone elses shadow. A raw nerve in the sunlight. You needed Silas Mason to cheat and win, just as you have always needed help to get anything in this industry.
What a pathetic little worm, Brianna Hill is. Someone void of any original or unique thought. Someone who is incapable for thinking for herself. Someone who needs someone, literally anyone, to pull her along. Brianna Hill is someone who needs someone to make every decision for her because she is so distrusting in herself and her abilities that she needs someone to tell her what to think, or what to do. But hey; she's made a successful career of it so far, I guess. I think the reality of the situation was that Silas Mason saw that I was never going to understand his vision exactly. That I wasn't going to blindly follow someone. But not you Brianna. That's all you've done your entire career. You are a follower. You are a blank slate with nothing going on in her head. You are truly pathetic. But now you have the Specialist Title; and I don't you stole it but I do I plan on reclaiming it. I have the respect of our fans and our peers. Silas Mason betrayed me because he feared me; and he knew that I didn't need him more than he needed me. It was mutually beneficial; and that's not the type of situation Silas Mason thrives in. He needs to have the upper hand at all times. And he'll never more of an upper hand than aligning himself with a empty headed dumb fuck like Brianna Hill. She will never second guess him. She will never think for herself. She will never think, well anything, really.
I will move on and continue to prove that I don't need ANYONE. That I can be successful here in EAW by doing things the right way. That I can do anything I put my mind to. It's time to rebuild and make a case for another title shot. To right the wrongs that I caused myself.
It's not surprising that I lost my title and immediately wasn't booked for a match here on Showdown. This brand has always been against me. Your former Specialists Champion loses her title; and you don't book her for a match? Pathetic behavior. But Kennedy and everyone else here in EAW knows that if they let me come out here raw and angry I would rip apart anyone they put in front of me. That I would expose how pathetic and undeserving this roster is. That if she put me in the ring with someone just a week after being betrayed, I would rip their fucking heads off. But hey, I'll take the high road again. That's all I ever do. I'll let my ring work do the talking again. I will be a good little soldier and show what I'm capable of, like I always do. I don't need Silas Mason to be successful; and Reasonable Doubt was just confirmation of what I've always known.
I don't need anyone.
This week I face Jordan Perkins. Another member of the Showdown roster who thinks they are the next big thing, but won't put in any work to actually show why they feel that way. Another lazy loser who is void of talent. Another person looking to take shortcuts. As if we don't have enough of those people here on Showdown, let alone EAW in general. These are the matches Showdown books me in because they know that if they consistently put me against their chosen ones I would expose each and every one of them. The aura farming goblins and ghouls that roam the locker room. So no, I have to be put against people like Jordan Perkins. I need to know my place.
But the unfortunate situation that Jordan Perkins finds himself in is that I just don't care enough to look too far into his past. I've never been a wrestler to underestimate or degrade others; but I am pissed off; and I have something to prove. So sadly for you, Jordan, you are going to be made an example of. It's not your fault. I was betrayed and embarrassed at Reasonable Doubt, so I am going to embarrass you. I don't hate you, I don't care about you. I just have a point to prove. I am going to show that I don't take losses as easily as I used to. I'm tired of losing; I'm tired of being cheated. I'm tired of people getting involved with my matches. I'm tired of having to face people that won't be here in a month. I'm just tired.
I don't like this brand; I never have. It's been the same rinse and repeat gripes from me. I'm tired of you; you'd think management would be too. Honestly, I have become so disillusioned with this company, that I grew up loving, I have made it my personal mission to expose every person who isn't willing to put in the effort it takes to succeed here.
It starts on Showdown.
I'm coming for Brianna Hill.
I'm coming for Silas Mason.
I'm coming for everyone.
It's a wonderful, wonderful life
No need to laugh and cry
It's a wonderful, wonderful life"
I obviously have a lot to say. Reasonable Doubt was a horrible night. Many have called it the worst night of my career so far. I disagree with that. To lose a title; you have to have been a champion in the first place. I climbed that mountain. I accomplished that goal. I am so grateful. So I'm not happy to lose the title; but I'd still rather lose and lose a title than lose and lose nothing, because I had nothing. Because I was nothing. I obviously have a lot of self reflecting to do. Nothing in my life has been more obvious than that.
What I'm not going to do is sulk and cry. What I'm not going to do is let this define me. What I'm not going to do is let this be the last anyone ever heard about Nikki Kimura. What I'm not going to do is let this be the most notable thing in my career. No. It's the opposite. This is just the beginning for me. This was a much needed reality check. I have nobody to blame but myself. I'm not surprised I was betrayed by Silas Mason; but have to admit I was little taken by surprise by WHEN it happened. But even more than that I am a little surprised that Silas Mason would pick such a talentless wrestler like Brianna Hill to support. Contrary to popular belief, I'm not stupid. Silas Mason moving on from me was always inevitable. I said as much when talking to Saori. I said that we were a means to an end. I knew Silas was using me; but that still showcased that I had enough talent to BE used. I had something to me. I don't think his betrayal changes that; but I will admit it's rocked my head a little bit. I'm a little directionless now. I didn't have the legendary title run I had hoped. But I'm not going to play the card, that so many AEW wrestlers have in the past. Like I said; I have nobody to blame but myself. I made a deal with the devil. I signed up for this. It's my burden to carry. Snakes in the Grass. Water is Wet. Such is life.
So while I'm feeling like a bag of shit; I am going to persevere. I am going to survive. I am going to do what I have always done and I'm going to learn from this. So while I say this was inevitable; I will have my revenge. Eventually. Because even though the timing took me by surprise; I won't let it slide. I am not going to move on until I feel vindicated. Because I care. I care so fucking much. This is all I have. I don't know how many times I have to say that I gave up everything to be here. I have been as honest as I can be at every turn, but the reality of it all is simple. I wouldn't change of it. I genuinely do believe that I learn from my mistakes; and I wouldn't be the person I am today without them. All was not sunny in Philadelphia; but I know what it takes to make sure that this is an important lesson. That I can still rebuild from the ashes of my mistakes. It is not over.
What makes me truly laugh is Brianna Hill. Brianna, you spent WEEKS talking about how she has changed. How you have found yourself. How you want to prove yourself. The only thing you have proven is how easily manipulated you are.
"Then all of a sudden it was like I couldn’t do anything on my own, that I was living in the shadow of someone else by pledging my allegiance to La Familia".
So to break out of that shadow you signed up for help from someone else? You felt uncomfortable with any form of spotlight, and had to hide in someone elses shadow. A raw nerve in the sunlight. You needed Silas Mason to cheat and win, just as you have always needed help to get anything in this industry.
What a pathetic little worm, Brianna Hill is. Someone void of any original or unique thought. Someone who is incapable for thinking for herself. Someone who needs someone, literally anyone, to pull her along. Brianna Hill is someone who needs someone to make every decision for her because she is so distrusting in herself and her abilities that she needs someone to tell her what to think, or what to do. But hey; she's made a successful career of it so far, I guess. I think the reality of the situation was that Silas Mason saw that I was never going to understand his vision exactly. That I wasn't going to blindly follow someone. But not you Brianna. That's all you've done your entire career. You are a follower. You are a blank slate with nothing going on in her head. You are truly pathetic. But now you have the Specialist Title; and I don't you stole it but I do I plan on reclaiming it. I have the respect of our fans and our peers. Silas Mason betrayed me because he feared me; and he knew that I didn't need him more than he needed me. It was mutually beneficial; and that's not the type of situation Silas Mason thrives in. He needs to have the upper hand at all times. And he'll never more of an upper hand than aligning himself with a empty headed dumb fuck like Brianna Hill. She will never second guess him. She will never think for herself. She will never think, well anything, really.
I will move on and continue to prove that I don't need ANYONE. That I can be successful here in EAW by doing things the right way. That I can do anything I put my mind to. It's time to rebuild and make a case for another title shot. To right the wrongs that I caused myself.
It's not surprising that I lost my title and immediately wasn't booked for a match here on Showdown. This brand has always been against me. Your former Specialists Champion loses her title; and you don't book her for a match? Pathetic behavior. But Kennedy and everyone else here in EAW knows that if they let me come out here raw and angry I would rip apart anyone they put in front of me. That I would expose how pathetic and undeserving this roster is. That if she put me in the ring with someone just a week after being betrayed, I would rip their fucking heads off. But hey, I'll take the high road again. That's all I ever do. I'll let my ring work do the talking again. I will be a good little soldier and show what I'm capable of, like I always do. I don't need Silas Mason to be successful; and Reasonable Doubt was just confirmation of what I've always known.
I don't need anyone.
This week I face Jordan Perkins. Another member of the Showdown roster who thinks they are the next big thing, but won't put in any work to actually show why they feel that way. Another lazy loser who is void of talent. Another person looking to take shortcuts. As if we don't have enough of those people here on Showdown, let alone EAW in general. These are the matches Showdown books me in because they know that if they consistently put me against their chosen ones I would expose each and every one of them. The aura farming goblins and ghouls that roam the locker room. So no, I have to be put against people like Jordan Perkins. I need to know my place.
But the unfortunate situation that Jordan Perkins finds himself in is that I just don't care enough to look too far into his past. I've never been a wrestler to underestimate or degrade others; but I am pissed off; and I have something to prove. So sadly for you, Jordan, you are going to be made an example of. It's not your fault. I was betrayed and embarrassed at Reasonable Doubt, so I am going to embarrass you. I don't hate you, I don't care about you. I just have a point to prove. I am going to show that I don't take losses as easily as I used to. I'm tired of losing; I'm tired of being cheated. I'm tired of people getting involved with my matches. I'm tired of having to face people that won't be here in a month. I'm just tired.
I don't like this brand; I never have. It's been the same rinse and repeat gripes from me. I'm tired of you; you'd think management would be too. Honestly, I have become so disillusioned with this company, that I grew up loving, I have made it my personal mission to expose every person who isn't willing to put in the effort it takes to succeed here.
It starts on Showdown.
I'm coming for Brianna Hill.
I'm coming for Silas Mason.
I'm coming for everyone.
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