MATCH PROMO Queen Bea > Princess Candice [KOE #003]

Bea Valentine

The Eternally Depressed

I just have no idea what a Winnie is. She keeps talking about Winnie The Pooh, and quite honestly. It just bewilders me, because is that Wilford's weird cousin? I definitely do think Winnie, is a definite wild creature. Wilford? He's a much cooler and trope defying character. And that is much more important to me than rather a.. Winnie. I just think that there's some issues with Princess Candice tits. I think those things are putting too much pressure on her head. I really do darling, I think you should get that checked out soon. But erm okay, whatever. Whatever I guess. I guess you won't allow me to fulfill my dream of being in Wilford's second sequel. This is where everyone's abstract attempt of caressing and believing in this, and proceeding with caution and care, is entirely thrown out the window. I just want to start by putting so many of your points down, you hag. I do believe that Princess Candice may be one of the most dumbfounded idiots in all of Elite Answers Wrestling. But even more, I believe that anyone who supports her is an ignorant idiot as well! I'll say this…

In my past. When I was a dumb blonde, who went around talking so much smack, like a schlemiel, I was a rather typical and horrible person. I still talk smack? Of course I still talk smack from time to time. But is it harsh? Not as much. I remember one time I used my vocabulary to say so many profanities, the FCC would have set me on fire. But that isn't me anymore. Look, if you wanna talk Disney. Let me talk my entire career, because it's almost laid out like a Disney movie dear. An unbent reality, where I have lived happily ever after. And for the last 100 days, I have reigned as Gloria's rightful owner. I think it should be established alone with what I have accomplished in EAW. Such early on. I won an Extreme Elimination Chamber. You know what you were doing whilst I was winning? Getting your buttox beaten! Let me reiterate. I mean, sure half of the women I beaten were schmucks and wifflewaffles, but guess what? Two of them are in big time match ups at King Of Elite! None of that is relevant however, just pretend I am giving you a statistic, so you won't run your mouth. I don't think you get it dear. I have made Gloria.. MY GLORIA. How many people say "Specialists Championship"?, MHM.. EXACTLY. People say Gloria. Because this is GLORIA. MY GLORIA. SHE WILL ALWAYS BE, MY GLORIA. MYYYYY GLORIA. She will be remembered as Gloria from now, until armageddon. Because that is whom she is. She is my Gloria. She is my baby. I have been in EAW for under a year, and made an identity that won't be forgotten. Everyone will remember the hopeful tale of Bea Valentine and Gloria. The most spectacular duo in all of EAW. Everyone will remember my first year in EAW. But my 2nd year is going to be even better. But as we engage closer, nothing wrong than slamming my foot on the gas! If I had a gas slipper, I'd shove it on the gas, right after I shoved it up your a- whatever. Don't even talk to me. You were talking about a dungeon? Darling do you think I'm scared of a dungeon? Threaten me with a good time. I know that I could say something to scare you. Like dungeon this, spooky that. But you wanna know what the scariest thing is to an idiot like you, who makes Disney their entire personality? REALITY.

That character you are foaming at the mouth over? Well there's an actor/actress doing their voice.. AND IT IS THE UGLIEST SCHLEMIEL YOU HAVE EVER SEEN! Not even joking either! Voice acting is the worst genre, it catfishes. Mon dieu. But regardless. You have to face reality. And how can you face reality, when you can't even look directly at it? None of this is sustainable. One day, I'll open my own theme park. Gloria-Land! We'll have all kinds of crazy rides, and instead of Mickey ears, we'll all walk around in bras. But that's besides the point dear, when they get Mickey Mouse for his illegal money laundering on an annual basis, you will be out of a job! And then, I'll hire you to come join Gloria-Land. Then, you can face reality! I took a look at reality head on. How did I respond to adversity? I dusted myself off and rose to the top. BEFORE WE EVEN SAID A WORD. My entire career trajectory, has been dating up to this moment. But along my failures, I saw Princess Candice beginning to make a dent.

I saw her have battles with the likes of Ashlynn Quinn and Caroline. Here's the kicker however, dear. At what point did any of that amount to anything? Felt like she was more hot and cold than a camping trip to Alaska in the summer. Princess Candice rocks at a tempo. As I examine back on her career, it's all so funny to me. I was throwing women off of cells, and she was fighting her twin sister Cameron. And she wants to yap at me like this? Seriously though? Ironic. I don't get it, I seriously don't get it. This woman has been in EAW for so long? Yet all she does is blabber about Disney. Surely there's gotta be SOMETHING.. to write home about? Imagine when I've been in EAW for as long as she has had? I'll probably have Gloria the Specialists Championship, Wilford the Interwire Championship Bartholomew the Hardcore Championship, and that much more additionally to my resume! While Princess Candice? She MIGHT have survived a match with me one second longer than predicted. But here's the thing; It gets quite overlooked. But the way you talk to me, I'm not a puppy. You can't just proclaim these things, and make me create beliefs. You can barely back yourself up in statistic. You are pretty pathetic dear. This is King Of Elite. And this may have been my most underwhelming rendition yet. While I do find myself somewhat enjoying Disney the park itself, and adoring Wilford. Here you go chérie, undermining it, and trying to paint a bigger picture. Something about these women with blonde hair. I couldn't imagine being a blonde woman again. I would probably off myself with a dosage of poison.

Alas however; I don't know. I really am contemplating it still. I think of the day I'm going to be without Gloria. This'll be an ugly day, it really will. But I just can't find it being so soon. I don't believe that Candice has an acrylic in her fingernail, that can shed blood from me. While me? I have claws babygirl. I have apsirations. We are THIS close to Pain For Pride. Do I think there's opportunity for me to take a full stroke, and be in grand positioning? Oh heck yes. I will go all that way dear, but this is me looking too far ahead. I am getting ahead of myself, I need to stop. BEA VALENTINE. REMEMBER YOUR CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT, DON'T WASTE ALL OF IT. I don't want to regress to the woman I was a year ago. It goes a little something like this; you are slewing so much nonsense. People have probably heard it before, flesh and blood. Disney isn't a victim, wanna know a victim? Delilah Rose, now that is a victim of being hideous! Rory Slate, is a victim of being a loser! Valerie Hellstorm, is a victim of failure! And you know what all those ladies have in common? One way or another, they lost because of me. One way or another, they got in my path.. I took them out. I'm not afraid to victimize you Princess. Sheesh, that sounds awful the way I put it into terms. But you get what I mean, slap you in the face, poke an eye. But oh well. I am speaking as a Disney neutral after this week. I think that maybe slander on the park is too much - but this is a weird place. You are weird yourself, dear. The only thing that could make you weirder, is if you started pretending to be a wannabe Marilyn Monroe. Now that would be a horrendous look on you.

It'll go like this dear. King Of Elite, you are going to step into my perspective. You aren't going to be talking about any glass slippers. I have the gout, and must wear orthopedic shoes, you know what.. Don't concern yourself with my feet. If you have an endearing foot fetish, you need to seek psychiatric help. I put a foot in my mouth once, and almost died. It was the most vulgar thing I've ever done, and I had that one incident in 1964 at Delaware. But don't worry about my feet, because you are going to see the way I see it, from my vision. When we are backed up in the corner, imagine this like legendary film of prehistoric and forgotten times, Rocky 4. The size difference is going to be too much to comprehend. I don't think you really get it, even with glass slippers on. Even with those heels, even with a thousand singing doves lifting you off the ground, as sparkles come out of your buttox.. You won't be measuring up to me! You aren't even close to me, dear. I believe it is time for you to finally realize, and officially embrace that. You have so much to conclude and get through, before you could even think of being the rightful mother of Gloria. But it just isn't going to work out for you. I have reigned with my baby for 100 days. While for the last 100 days, all you have done is sit there at Disney. Let this be a daunting perspective. Princess Candice is a ticking time bomb of emotions, yet she can't fathom that if she looks into the mirror she can see her own future. I stand over her holding Gloria, while tears come out of her eyes. I hope she doesn't go too hard on the makeup, because It'll be a mushy mesh, soon then. Fyi, I just wish to state.. All this hatred is dawned on by her own ignorance. She picked the fight with me, and now? She is refusing to send in my audition tape! AND HERE YOU ARE WITH MAIN CHARACTER SYNDROME! IT WASN'T YOU BEING KILLED OFF IN THE TAPE!!!!!!! Do you know how many women have the name Candice? So many. You aren't even one of the special ones. I just said that name, because it was the first one I could think of. You need severe mental help. But alas; King Of Elite dear. How will Princess Candice...

Answer the call when she stands before the Queen Bea?

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