- Messages
- 35
- Points
- 18
…any time you watch porn, the chances of you becoming a criminal spikes tremendously. Jefferey Dahmer? Gooner. Ted Bundy? Gooner. Netanyahu? Probably a gooner. According to the studies conducted by Golde University, the only true way to become great is to sleep with many women. Unfortunately, the only way to acquire that skill for the majority incels is sign up for one of my many courses. They start at a low price of one grand per class! And if you type in the code “TRIPLEJMORELIKETRIPLEL” you can get a two-percent discount! How generous! Don’t wait though or you’ll be making skin furniture out of college chicks before you know it!
While we’re on the topic of people that have possibly skinned women alive before, Jay Jerry Johnson, welcome back to EAW! Now, I’ve been told by the unpaid intern who watches and summarizes EAW shows for that younger been around for a few weeks now. However, since you did trigger not my clout-radar, I didn’t really give a shit. The intern let me know that you were challenging the Interwire champion! Then I asked the intern what the hell the Interwire championship is and he informed me that it is the beta-cuck title of EAW. If that’s the case Jerry, then you must be a shoe-in to win it! After all, so far you beat…a deadbeat dad who’s liver was given worse treatment than a journalist in Saudi Arabia. I’m not sure what that’s supposed to do for you, but congrats? You know what’s already beaten Kirk? Life. Not impressive at all.
Meanwhile, Clayton Golde had a MAJOR victory last week! Over that guy…you know…the guy…other Jay! Yes, other Jay with the unfortunate last name! If you played that match on repeat like millions across the world had, you’d see that simply being the sigma I am, I was able to beat him. It’s genetics mostly, but also my charm, guile, and all around superiority in just about every avenue of life. Once again, I proved that some people are just built better. You used to be that way Jerry.
Once upon a time, you were doing alpha shit. Talking trash and pissing people off…but now what? You’r not that guy? I want to go back and listen to HIM talk. The cool Jerry. But now when I look at you…I see a weaker chin. Literally your face has gotten rounder which ea ch passing day. Maybe you spent your time off shooting soy directly into your bones, screwing fat chicks, or masturbating to some kind weird shit involving horses, but my time is always spent honing the craft. And you might be thinking Jay “well I trained in wrestling!” “I rolled around the ring oiled up and ass out with a few other men and taught myself a move!” That’s not my craft. My craft is being a God amongst beta-males. My craft is domination on a global scale. Every industry, every product, every game.
I don’t know if you know this Jay, considering you have a limited pool of knowledge to draw from: I have never been defeated fairly in EAW. Nobody has managed to beat me through truly fair methods! The people who haven’t had the matrix working on their behalf fail every single time. They seek to silence me because I’m not afraid to tell it like it is! I’m not afraid to talk about the nature of man. The powers that be don’t want you to half high testosterone. They don’t want you to get pussy and smoke cigars. They don’t want you to set up a manufacturing plant for energy drinks in third world countries. All things real men USED to be able to do. Only a true master, a Golden God, can do all of that and more. See Jay, I’m just the fucking man. I do what I want, I take what I want, and I look perfect doing it.
You could be that way too. If you had spent your time off in one of my retreats, you could have come back a foot taller and have a razor-sharp profile. You’d have a million bucks in Goldecoin, six different girlfriends, and an STD that has yet to be named. I could offer you that. After I beat the dogshit out of you and send you back into LaLaLand. Because, I have the “honor” of being in that Battle Royal match. You know the one entirely framed around me? Sure you have that Nejari, some other guys, Nejari, some other guys, the guy I beat last week….and some other guys. They are all just playing second fiddle. Same as you bud. Although at this point I’m not even sure if you’d be second chair.
Jay, you had a smart strategy against Kirk. Nobody can take that away from you. Here’s the downer though, being smart against Kirk is kinda like being taller than a midget. It applies to the vast majority of the world. I’m in the one percent. You are in the ninety-nine. I’m a fucking God Jay. If I faced Kirk, I’d have him begging me to let him walk away. I’d have his daughter flashing a camera from a penthouse in Dubai before the bell even rung. Because when I take aim at someone, I aim for the head. Fuck the heart. Now, you’re not nearly as fleshed out as Kirk. The only thing on your mind is that Interwire title. I don’t blame you, it is probably the only title you’re gonna be able to get anymore. But uh…I’m a world championship contender. The only reason I haven’t had my shot is because the network knows it would liberate millions. There’d be so many guys getting laid that night that the baby boom would crash the economy. You are a great punching bag for me though.
It’s obvious to anyone who has any grey matter at all between their ears that I’m winning the extreme enigma battle royal. It’s obvious to anyone who isn’t knee-deep in cuckold porn and feminist propaganda that I’m going to smash you Jay. But you may think otherwise. That’s a stupid thought, but I’m all for free speech. Without, we’d just be Facebook. This is EAW though. Just like X, we are encouraged to pursue the truth. Only…I seem to be the only one brave enough to say it: I’m the main-event. It doesn’t matter where or when, which jobber I’m smashing, people want to see ME. And that’s because I’m undeniable Jay. I make Fort Knox look like a fucking piggy bank. Everyone pales in comparison to me. Wrestlers, businessmen, lovers, models, they all fail to measure up. And you Jay, you aren’t even one of the best here! If Drake King or Myles or whoever the fuck else passes for a legend around here was stroking their ego in front of me, I’d say “go off king.” But not you. Never you.
Jay, unlike Kirk, you’re not about to score some clout off me. It’s the number two catchphrase of mine: NO FREE CLOUT! If I decide that you don’t deserve the six billion eyes I bring on any night, then I’ll deny you. I won’t tag you in my victory photo, I’ll redact your name in the documents, I’ll erase you. But that’s the work that comes after the fact. First I have to erase you in the ring. Which isn’t a problem for me. He’ll, it’s not even approaching an inconvenience. All of my perfectly legal pharmaceutical goods, my expensive diet, my perfect training routines, they forged me into the weapon that I am. It doesn’t hurt that my IQ can’t be measured on any human instruments either. Shit, I’m so smart that I literally sell water to fish. It’s a good market. Compared to that…what the fuck are you Jay? A an absolute NOBODY! That’s all anyone is in this company. And they are fine when they are in their bubbles jerking each other off in the locker room, but when you step into my world…the world that consumes yours…then you are a grain in the sand in MY dessert. And no, I’m not going to say I am the dessert. I’m the guy who owns every piece of sand. When it gets too rough, I’ll just turn it into glass Jay. Because nothing, and I truly mean NOTHING in this entire universe…
Nothing shines quite like Golde.
While we’re on the topic of people that have possibly skinned women alive before, Jay Jerry Johnson, welcome back to EAW! Now, I’ve been told by the unpaid intern who watches and summarizes EAW shows for that younger been around for a few weeks now. However, since you did trigger not my clout-radar, I didn’t really give a shit. The intern let me know that you were challenging the Interwire champion! Then I asked the intern what the hell the Interwire championship is and he informed me that it is the beta-cuck title of EAW. If that’s the case Jerry, then you must be a shoe-in to win it! After all, so far you beat…a deadbeat dad who’s liver was given worse treatment than a journalist in Saudi Arabia. I’m not sure what that’s supposed to do for you, but congrats? You know what’s already beaten Kirk? Life. Not impressive at all.
Meanwhile, Clayton Golde had a MAJOR victory last week! Over that guy…you know…the guy…other Jay! Yes, other Jay with the unfortunate last name! If you played that match on repeat like millions across the world had, you’d see that simply being the sigma I am, I was able to beat him. It’s genetics mostly, but also my charm, guile, and all around superiority in just about every avenue of life. Once again, I proved that some people are just built better. You used to be that way Jerry.
Once upon a time, you were doing alpha shit. Talking trash and pissing people off…but now what? You’r not that guy? I want to go back and listen to HIM talk. The cool Jerry. But now when I look at you…I see a weaker chin. Literally your face has gotten rounder which ea ch passing day. Maybe you spent your time off shooting soy directly into your bones, screwing fat chicks, or masturbating to some kind weird shit involving horses, but my time is always spent honing the craft. And you might be thinking Jay “well I trained in wrestling!” “I rolled around the ring oiled up and ass out with a few other men and taught myself a move!” That’s not my craft. My craft is being a God amongst beta-males. My craft is domination on a global scale. Every industry, every product, every game.
I don’t know if you know this Jay, considering you have a limited pool of knowledge to draw from: I have never been defeated fairly in EAW. Nobody has managed to beat me through truly fair methods! The people who haven’t had the matrix working on their behalf fail every single time. They seek to silence me because I’m not afraid to tell it like it is! I’m not afraid to talk about the nature of man. The powers that be don’t want you to half high testosterone. They don’t want you to get pussy and smoke cigars. They don’t want you to set up a manufacturing plant for energy drinks in third world countries. All things real men USED to be able to do. Only a true master, a Golden God, can do all of that and more. See Jay, I’m just the fucking man. I do what I want, I take what I want, and I look perfect doing it.
You could be that way too. If you had spent your time off in one of my retreats, you could have come back a foot taller and have a razor-sharp profile. You’d have a million bucks in Goldecoin, six different girlfriends, and an STD that has yet to be named. I could offer you that. After I beat the dogshit out of you and send you back into LaLaLand. Because, I have the “honor” of being in that Battle Royal match. You know the one entirely framed around me? Sure you have that Nejari, some other guys, Nejari, some other guys, the guy I beat last week….and some other guys. They are all just playing second fiddle. Same as you bud. Although at this point I’m not even sure if you’d be second chair.
Jay, you had a smart strategy against Kirk. Nobody can take that away from you. Here’s the downer though, being smart against Kirk is kinda like being taller than a midget. It applies to the vast majority of the world. I’m in the one percent. You are in the ninety-nine. I’m a fucking God Jay. If I faced Kirk, I’d have him begging me to let him walk away. I’d have his daughter flashing a camera from a penthouse in Dubai before the bell even rung. Because when I take aim at someone, I aim for the head. Fuck the heart. Now, you’re not nearly as fleshed out as Kirk. The only thing on your mind is that Interwire title. I don’t blame you, it is probably the only title you’re gonna be able to get anymore. But uh…I’m a world championship contender. The only reason I haven’t had my shot is because the network knows it would liberate millions. There’d be so many guys getting laid that night that the baby boom would crash the economy. You are a great punching bag for me though.
It’s obvious to anyone who has any grey matter at all between their ears that I’m winning the extreme enigma battle royal. It’s obvious to anyone who isn’t knee-deep in cuckold porn and feminist propaganda that I’m going to smash you Jay. But you may think otherwise. That’s a stupid thought, but I’m all for free speech. Without, we’d just be Facebook. This is EAW though. Just like X, we are encouraged to pursue the truth. Only…I seem to be the only one brave enough to say it: I’m the main-event. It doesn’t matter where or when, which jobber I’m smashing, people want to see ME. And that’s because I’m undeniable Jay. I make Fort Knox look like a fucking piggy bank. Everyone pales in comparison to me. Wrestlers, businessmen, lovers, models, they all fail to measure up. And you Jay, you aren’t even one of the best here! If Drake King or Myles or whoever the fuck else passes for a legend around here was stroking their ego in front of me, I’d say “go off king.” But not you. Never you.
Jay, unlike Kirk, you’re not about to score some clout off me. It’s the number two catchphrase of mine: NO FREE CLOUT! If I decide that you don’t deserve the six billion eyes I bring on any night, then I’ll deny you. I won’t tag you in my victory photo, I’ll redact your name in the documents, I’ll erase you. But that’s the work that comes after the fact. First I have to erase you in the ring. Which isn’t a problem for me. He’ll, it’s not even approaching an inconvenience. All of my perfectly legal pharmaceutical goods, my expensive diet, my perfect training routines, they forged me into the weapon that I am. It doesn’t hurt that my IQ can’t be measured on any human instruments either. Shit, I’m so smart that I literally sell water to fish. It’s a good market. Compared to that…what the fuck are you Jay? A an absolute NOBODY! That’s all anyone is in this company. And they are fine when they are in their bubbles jerking each other off in the locker room, but when you step into my world…the world that consumes yours…then you are a grain in the sand in MY dessert. And no, I’m not going to say I am the dessert. I’m the guy who owns every piece of sand. When it gets too rough, I’ll just turn it into glass Jay. Because nothing, and I truly mean NOTHING in this entire universe…
Nothing shines quite like Golde.
